Drinking Culture and the Promiscuity That Goes Along With It

"Drinking culture and the sexual promiscuity that goes along with that. Goes along with that, like a side effect, like fries on the side of your order. Where does promiscuity even come into play?"

From the letter of the awesomely, strong and world changing young lady sexually assaulted by a Stanford student who received less than a year of jail time and probation for fear that he might be negatively impacted.  What. In. The. Hell.

Sorry to my church family.

Why in THE world, in this day in age is this even something that someone would consider giving a "talk" about?

This letter was powerful. Sad. Eye opening and encouraging. I read it, in it's entirety to my two daughters. I read it, as I sat there crying and snotting thinking about the women I know who have had some type of sexual offense against them.  Women who never got justice.

I read it to my two beautiful daughters who know exactly what is going on in this world but STILL are naive and innocent in some respect.

Because as young girls in high school, where young boys tend to act out their sexual frustrations and heightened hormonal fantasies, in the form of butt slapping and rubbing their sexual appendages on the backsides of girls, (which has happened to one of my girls) I wanted them to understand.

Understand the mindset of a young man who hasn't learned how to respect a woman/girl.

That it needs to start early when they are young.

You see when this 10th grader rubbed his penis against my daughter's butt, I was incensed. I was livid. I wanted to go up to the school and give this young boy a dressing down myself but was not allowed to because of the laws that govern parents involvement with other children in schools.

My daughter, on the other hand, thought it was disgusting but didn't want him to get in trouble.

There.
Right there.
Is the problem.
With respect.
And self-respect.

For yourself and your body. And why it's important to teach our daughters that although however "cute" or funny the little games boys play may be, they still need to know that your body is yours alone and should NOT be touched in any way sexually or otherwise without your consent.

And before some intellectual advocate for the idea that kids will be kids rises up to scold me, I am in no way saying that innocent flirting between kids can lead to rape.  That's not what I am saying.

What I am saying is, fathers talk to your daughters - the first place a girl should get her validation is from her father. He needs to let her know that she as well as Her body is hers and hers alone, that it's to be respected.

Fathers talk to your sons. Better yet, show them that a woman is more than a bitch or a hoe, more than just a body to be sexually idolized on TV,  in music videos, in songs.

She and her body are worth more and should garner more respect than what seems to be the general acceptance of a confused new feminism that applauds women who hold their looks and sexuality as trophies to be handed out, put on display and celebrated because simply we're women. And strong.

Respect should be something that is actionable. If a boy or a young woman understands that respect is more than words then they will have the courage to speak up for themselves, their friends. The courage to tell someone, which may be their friend, that hey, I don't want to be touched like that, even if you are playing. No, it's not ok that you rub your penis on my behind to satisfy your perverted sexual wet daydream.

And that same friend should understand that it's not a scolding, but a wake up call. And therefore, you being mad at me for asking, demanding respect is irresponsible, selfish, immature and grossly misguided.

Respect is something that should develop character and integrity which breeds responsibility.

If my character and integrity have any merit, then I'm going to be responsible enough to try and make the right decisions. Even when no one is looking.

And when that same responsibility, integrity and character is found to be less than, I'm going to not only accept the consequences for my actions BUT ALSO own up to them.  Not try to rationalize. Not try to make it easier on my family because I let them down, so I put the blame elsewhere. But acknowledge that I royally messed up and what can I do to try and fix it.

I don't know Brock Allen Turner. I don't know his parents. Or his lawyer. I don't know this young girl or what she believes. But all of those folks can take a lesson from this young woman.  Because she gets it. Despite her pain.  She understands.

Though he slay me, yet will I trust in him: but I will maintain mine own ways before him. (KJV)

Many people question the sovereignty of God. How can he allow these things to happen?

God gave us the right to choose.  We as humans experience horrible, terrible atrocities. And we rail against God. But in our pain, we have an opportunity.

An opportunity to show just how glorious God is: God might kill me, but I have no other hope. I am going to argue my case with him. (NLT)

I will not be silenced. I will forgive. I will trust again. I will praise. I will take my terrible, atrocious, horrible ordeal and show the world.

I'm. Still. Here.